The ToiletBowl

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Until The MOST InSignigifant Game Is Played This Year!

Queen Hazel: A Storied and Tragic History

Hazel: Queen of the ToiletBowlWho is this "Hazel" that we talk about? Let's just start with a little history...and if you know your ToiletBowl History then you know that every year a queen is chosen to represent the ToiletBowl throughout the year. In fact, all high schools have adopted this selection process and have called the title "homecoming queen". How lame.

Through the years several women were chosen and the competition became quickly heated. Several instances of on-field brawls erupted during past selection processes and the staff at TBHQ quickly decided that no "real" woman should hold the title. We need someone who has a thick skin who would put herself above the gossip, someone with integrity that didn't speak at all. We found the perfect queen in Hazel.

From 1994 to 2004, Hazel ruled the game with dignity and brought a newfound respect for the game. Players loved her and fans adored her. She surpassed previous ToiletBowl Queens by taking the Golden Sceptor to the masses. She met with foreign dignitaries, fed the poor, and mingled in the stars. Hazel truly brought about a Golden Age with the Game.

Sadly in 2004 Hazel left us. Like a gust of wind she came into our lives and like the fleeting wind she left us unexpectedly. In fact, all the air left her. With every page, turn, turn, turn...or so some song by some lame band says. Another page has turned in the history of the ToiletBowl: Queen Hazel has passed. Up until her reign, several queens came and went but she brought unity and hope. Hazel, we'll miss you.

Don't forget to view the slideshow produced by TBHQ (be sure to turn your speakers down or wear headphones, it's emotional).